the female gaze

Look with your eyes, not with your hands.


Such a minute fraction of this life do we live: so much is sleep, tooth-brushing, waiting for mail, for metamorphosis, for those sudden moments of incandescence: unexpected, but once one knows them, one can live life in the light of their past and the hope of their future.



A grad student muses on her life, film, friends, politics, reality televizzle, and music.


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"The story of your life is not your life, it's your story" -- John Barth
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Wednesday, September 04, 2002
 
Feng Shui and A Polo Shirt of a Different Color

In attempting to reduce my cargo of boxes and overflowing bags of health and beauty aids, I of course left some essential items at home that would suit my new big, white room well - like sufficient lighting beyond my Akari lantern and a desk lamp. I guess shelving would be good too - but perhaps my big blue wooden shelf would be a bit too much. My desk has no drawers. it's actually quite a spacious room but I need more room to hide things because right now, everything is hanging out in the spacious floor area that expands wide beyond the carpet.

Well, I cut back on bringing the old clothes - the ones I never wear anyway - but I am completely overwhelmed with what falls into the new catagory, I have close to a dozen new shirts that I've picked up in the past few months. A new wardrobe, when sitting in one place, and colors are conversing with one another in a rainbow gradient of blacks, blues, and punchy reds - it's a beautiful thing. I haven't dealt with the poster thing (enjoying the minimalism of a very white room, just my laptop and futuristic flat silver speakers) so the clothes are a nice contrast, I just have no idea when I became such a summery person and my tshirts and tanks crowded out the perennial favorite, the turtleneck sweater. New York must have something to do with this.

I bought some seltzer today and got a bad batch. This tastes horrid, like a lingering taste of dust. Icky.

In an exhilerating season cliffhanger, Kelly of course triumphed to become American Idol. She was very deserving, sang her pudgy little ass off, and I am happy to see that she came out on top over the Side-Show Bob look alike, freaky Justin Guarini. I like Kelly's single too. Also, in become reacquainted with the college life and its perks, I've delved deep into the annals of KaZaa. I am impressed to see how many American Idol performances have found their way onto peer to peer networks. Unfortunately, KaZaa doesn't seem as fast as my beloved AudioGalaxy, which on a good night, you could have a song downloaded by the time you retrieved it from the folder, so I haven't been able to evaluate their quality yet.

Tonight I get to brush my teeth in my own room for the first time in my Middlebury career - a la my nouveau sink. It's a nice ammenity - like I went from dorm to hostel, it's about damn time.

Tomorrow is Judicial Council training and I am excited. I've already managed to see most of my adult friends, ie. staff and deans, so tomorrow will be more of the same and even mingling with people my own age, or nearly my age since I am a fossil by Middlebury standards. It's good to be home though - and feels more like home than anywhere else, presently.