the female gaze

Look with your eyes, not with your hands.


Such a minute fraction of this life do we live: so much is sleep, tooth-brushing, waiting for mail, for metamorphosis, for those sudden moments of incandescence: unexpected, but once one knows them, one can live life in the light of their past and the hope of their future.



A grad student muses on her life, film, friends, politics, reality televizzle, and music.


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"The story of your life is not your life, it's your story" -- John Barth
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Friday, September 06, 2002
 
A good meal and good friends are among the finest things in the world

Pleasant surprises and knocks on my door from far away travelers from Nepal and Japan, especially because security willl gouge you $100 per day to get your key early. It's so good to have Jeremy and Yoshi back and to sit back and feed on wonderful, unbelievable stories - like a Nepalese man who confuses the words lesbian & albino and transvestite & birkenstock, several day hikes, Indian weddings, bartering with a tailor, learning to cook and play sitar... wandering around the new monstrosity on high, the new Ross dining hall and quivering in the mammoth force of "La Force Hall." Awaiting Yoshi to recover from a red-eye flight from the west coast so that we can all throw back a few beers and scheme about debate, oh, fun! Just the same, high expectations and such great characters in town. We'll bridge the culture shock and find common ground once again...

Judicial training seminar went beautifully this afternoon, what a smart and good group of kids to be around. I like this bunch. We come together under the most dismal pretenses, to evaluate lapses of judgement and deliberate mistakes, but at the same time, it remains to be such a highlight of the daily grind.

Everyone else floods back tomorrow - so I'll give up my personal hall to the masses and submit to the comprimised living environment of sharing some common ground and a sink with a stranger and even my sanity and health for what is already reputed to be the most stoned hallway, ever. Enjoying the space and the quiet while I can. Eating up more than my fair share of bandwidth and abusing KaZaa. And life has been enhanced since discovering the Royal Tenenbaums' soundtrack (such a good movie too) and more tracks from the Velvet Underground, beloved Norah Jones, two versions of the Hallelujah song featured so prominently in movies and TV shows this summer, and as usual, my life is always that much better when the music is new, appropriate, and genuinely good and listenable. I've actually ordered some actual things from Amazon (the used section which has fantastic deals), the Bleecker Street CD (all remakes from the 60s) I've pined over all summer and Sex and the City 1 (a season I didn't see much of) DVD for twenty bones that I'll eventually be able to watch on the TV I fully intend to purchase.

Jack is finally famous. Send him fan mail.

Meanwhile, my sister is about to have her first college weekend - off-campus parties (with constricting Catholic rules aside) and all that other fun and liberating stuff that happens when you're 18 and in college for the first time... eh, those were good times, but once is enough. Just the thought of the gauntlet my liver use to run, I'm wheezing.