Look with your eyes, not with your hands.


Such a minute fraction of this life do we live: so much is sleep, tooth-brushing, waiting for mail, for metamorphosis, for those sudden moments of incandescence: unexpected, but once one knows them, one can live life in the light of their past and the hope of their future.



A grad student muses on her life, film, friends, politics, reality televizzle, and music.

 
A Simple Thought to Occupy My Time

Time to follow up my rolling thunder entry about, in a very second grade sense, "what blogging means to me." This evening I have the distinct pleasure of writing a recommendation for a good friend, Jeremy, and it's nice to sit and do justice for someone so deserving. True of most of the "good" writing I've done, this began as a scribbled paper trail mapping out the non-linear workings of my brain in the ever difficult task of pinning down a three dimensional person, experience, qualities, and what really matters into a two dimensional page of letters and punctuation. But I hope I can get it down right as a I continue to tinker on this letter over the next few days. I am really glad to do it.

The past few days have brought the antsiness of someone hanging, anxiously, and what feels like endlessly, in limbo. I've jumped at every available errand, cleaned house, and got the mail in my pajamas in hopes of a good word. Today, I emailed several temp agencies in hope of earning a paycheck before the month is out. Temping seems to be the best immediate direction because the work is steady and very little is expected in terms of staying for a two-week courtesy or any longer than I have to, should something better come along. Let's pray that something better does come along. I can't believe I've been home for five or six weeks, this seems to be the threshold when my standards bottom out and I'll bite at the next line dangled before me. Hindsight is always 20/20, but had I known it would have taken this long to get a real interview, I would have signed up with a temp service in February.

Of course I need to comment on the super sized American Idol tonight. One thing I've noticed lately, and I'll credit the television puppetmasters with a minor victory, is that television programs have soared above being just your average run of the mill show, but they've morphed into, surrounded and shielded with antiscipation, "events." How I tremble in their awesomeness. So the big, 120 minute American Idol event tonight. Let me just say, 12 contestants is a lot, and it is looking like a good lot. I was really impressed with several performers tonight and I am genuinely routing for several of my "favorites" including a laundry list that goes something like Clay, Ruben, Josh, Rickey, and T-something (my brain is a little slow tonight - Paula's wild card choice, Trenyce?). I don't know what good voting for six people will do, but I was really moved, call it my strong sense of civic virtue and a clouded belief that my vote (at least symbolically) matters, to vote for six. This will be a real race to the top and I am looking forward to the rest of the competition unfolding. I really dug tonight's show because I happen to be a Motown fantatic. I also think the genre suits the show because it's familiar to the audience, energetic, and helps avoid the boring ballads that no one has heard before and as a result, drag the show down all too often. Kimberely Locke had a bad night, but hopefully she'll get another chance to prove herself. She has a wonderful voice, but I don't think it was the right match for Motown. Two hours is really long though, it asks a lot to remain attentive. Granted after an hour, usually, I am the first to want more, but it's overwhelming. I am looking forward to weeding the field down a bit - won't miss you Julia, Charles, Carmen, or the pink haired Kelly Osbourne wanna-be (Vanessa?).

Kristin is home on break and being Miss Lazy Bones. I can't say that I blame her, I was just as happy to be home, sleep all day, wear my pajamas, and watch TV professionally when "I was her age." Tomorrow I am going to try to lure her out of the house to accompany me on my tasks, I'll probably fail. Not much planned for the rest of the week now that the job wheels are moving and it's approaching Wednesday. Opted to go to nearby Mt. Holyoke this weekend and debate for probably the last time this season, and effectually, the last time "competitively." I've actually never debated with Yoshi, so I think this will bring forth it's own breed of humor, unseriousness, and probably some little fact flubbing. I expect that we'll have fun and probably split a bottle of Jim Bean before third round. Actually, there was a pretty serious drinking incident involving the team at Wellesley last weekend, so maybe we'll have to set a better example. I am thankful this incident didn't happen on my watch, but there is probably nothing anyone could have done to prevent it, and it sounds like was handled admirably. We've all made some stupid decisions with the devil's brew, but apparently some of us still don't know, in an Austro-Hungarian accent, "their grappa limit." There better be none of that this weekend... and if there is, I am flashing my alumni immunity card and enjoying a rare air of irresponsibility.
posted by lmjasinski at 12:31 AM