the female gaze

Look with your eyes, not with your hands.


Such a minute fraction of this life do we live: so much is sleep, tooth-brushing, waiting for mail, for metamorphosis, for those sudden moments of incandescence: unexpected, but once one knows them, one can live life in the light of their past and the hope of their future.



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"The story of your life is not your life, it's your story" -- John Barth
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Saturday, May 29, 2004
 
A Rainy Day in the Neighborhood

I think I'm into my pre-summer manic streak. After months of not getting things settled (jobs, apartments) I think, upon returning from LA, I finally got up my urge to make some decisions and get things done.

Madison is a ghost town. Most friends are away, either at home or visiting elsewhere so things are very quiet. Laura's here and she's been a good compatriot in terms of laziness. Last night we drank gin and tonics and watched the "Prom Date" marathon on HBO. It was great.

Otherwise, I've been trying to keep busy and fill up my appointment calendar. I've made lots of appointments to see apartments, although, I found the perfect place today. It's in our price range, in the neighborhood I want, and it's very modern, in a 1960s retro kind of way. It's HUGE, freshly painted and has lovely hardwood floors. The floorplan is definitely modern (one room kind of bleeds into the next) but it is stunning, and spacious, and amazingly nice while still being affordable. I don't think I give myself enough credit, but I had resigned myself to living in a dump and thought I'd never get anything close to this fantastic.

I have a job interview on Wednesday for a summer position I'd be thrilled to get - it's doing PR / planning for the opening of a new performing arts center in Madison. It's only 16hrs a week, I'd just assume it would be more hours (more hours = more money), but it sounds interesting and I like that it draws on a bunch of museum-y skills that aren't otherwise getting much exercise.

Things are still very up in the air and roller-coasty in terms of Patrick's job hunt. I think he's decided not to go to Scotland for the interview because he likely wouldn't take the job (for a number of compelling reasons). There are new jobs announced daily and others continue to sit, stagnant, and wait. He gets back this week and I can't wait, if for no other reason, because so few people are around and also because it's easier to talk about things like jobs / futures face-to-face instead of on the phone...

My plan on this rainy Saturday is to lay in bed and watch 1940s movies. I am embarrassed how little progress I've made in terms of planning my summer course - but I really need deadlines to kick in to get me moving on anything (hence the lack of job / apartment).