the female gaze

Look with your eyes, not with your hands.


Such a minute fraction of this life do we live: so much is sleep, tooth-brushing, waiting for mail, for metamorphosis, for those sudden moments of incandescence: unexpected, but once one knows them, one can live life in the light of their past and the hope of their future.



A grad student muses on her life, film, friends, politics, reality televizzle, and music.


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"The story of your life is not your life, it's your story" -- John Barth
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Saturday, July 03, 2004
 
My Patriot Act**

The biggest news in my little household is that Patrick became a visiting assistant professor yesterday, or maybe a lecturer, we haven't quite figured out the title at Washington University in St. Louis, a very solid school driving distance (6hrs) from Madison. It means that he'll have to adapt and talk about television, radio, and new media, but he's a smart guy and I am sure he won't disappoint them. Exciting and I think it'll be a good thing, all around - put him in a solid position to go back on the job market (this is a 1 yr thing), a healthier paycheck than the State of Wisconsin is capable of cutting, and maybe a needed boost of confidence.

Lots of other good things. The maintenance guys came yesterday and installed "the little air conditioner that could." At first I was a little worried when I turned it on, that it wouldn't really do the trick, but last night I slept happily, in a cocoon of a down blanket while outside the muggy air teased and bothered all the suckers without the magic AC. It just started getting hot in Madison, but I stand by the fact that this may be the best $80 I've ever spent. When the guys came, they also did some other great things - took my broken kitchen drawer away to be replaced, managed to give the ceiling fan the right amount of loving, lubrication or shimmy-ing to revive it from the dead, and did something, I don't know what, that will make the oven work. I've tried and that oven just gives me problems - won't heat up or turn on (it's been used exactly twice since I've lived here) but now that it's fiery and ready, it'll be much easier to roast veggies under the broiler and a great place to make pizza on Patrick's pizza stone. All of a sudden, new meaning to the oft-quoted saying, "there's no place like home." I also did some fun things yesterday - including a Target-run and a trip to the hipster laundromat where you can buy beer for a buck, watch cable, surf the net (or if you're like me, play Master Boggle) and get clean sheets washed and dried quick... and for cheap.

What a difference a day makes. For the record, as much as a success that Preston Sturges was to my audience of elder pupils, Hawks' Bringing Up Baby was a complete and utter failure. I actually watched the film for the first time the night before my lecture and if anything, this crash and burn experience may very well prevent me from ever doing that again. It just wasn't as smart or funny as the Sturges films. I anticipated the day to be more of "them talking" kind of day and it wasn't, I had to fill time, and I did so in horrible way. It's funny, when I teach undergrads, I can always break them into little groups to do some bullshit impromptu presentation for the class, this group is older, wiser and won't fall for such a silly ploy. Anyway, lesson learned. So now I am sitting in the library with a bunch of books on my table, but email and blogging are proving too ripe a distraction - next week is Cary Grant / Katharine Hepburn week, which should be easier and give me a chance to redeem myself. Also, they've given me the recent HBO movie Second Civil War to watch and incorporate the style of the film into my lectures.

I went to see Spiderman 2 yesterday. Now, I am not a huge fan of comic books / the comic book franchise movies that seem to be all the rage these days. I did like the first web-crawler movie however when I saw it on TV. Tobey Maguire is really good in the first film and he's very solid in the sequel. He plays the part well and I like how "average" he is, special powers aside. Now, some critics are boasting that the sequel is better than the original and everyone predicts that this will be the movie of the summer. There may be truth in the later prediction, but I don't think it's better than the first. It's not as romantic or as funny as the first one. Hate to ruin the surprise, but they don't come anywhere close to topping the upside-down kiss from the first. The special effects are kind of cheesy too - the CGI of spidey swinging through the city isn't anything special. And, if I never see Alfred Molina's flabby chest again, I'll be the better for it. All that being said, I did enjoy the film. It's big and loud and pretty and the story has more depth than most action movies do. So do something all-American this weekend, throw some money to this venture and then go eat a hotdog or something. Nothing says patriotism like a cylinder of ground-up pig inerds and big ol' blockbuster. Wash it down with a coke. My latest nationalistic gesture is that I just picked up The Last Tycoon, F. Scott Fitzgerald's unfinished novel about Hollywood. A little bedtime reading and while I have the free time, I may as well read some fiction and remember how nicely words can sound in the hands of a true master.

I'm glad to have a weekend - even though, like a slave, I am being worked on July 5th (the all-important day after a holiday). It's been a long hectic week of working and the excitement wrapped around Patrick's interview. I don't think I gave the proper shout out to some visiting out-of-towners, Ted, his LA-based friend Dan, and a Georgian who doesn't take too kindly to NYC, Carter, who were kind enough to grace me with their presence on a cross-country road trip earlier this week. We laughed, we cried, had a few drinks at Nat Spill. But it's always nice to see old friends and even more so when they come to you...

**Clever title stolen from one of my fellow clever grad students